22 reasons to survive.

They told me many stories, some told me better human to be, some told me to be careful. 

So should be scared 'cause the one who stays downstairs and says he loves me, is a psychopath? 

Or should I love him back, and expect to be killed one day in the near future?

Should I be happy 'cause I've worked too hard all these years, earned myself more than I could've ever dreamt about?

Or should I cry, 'cause I couldn't do anything to save the one I loved, while he lied dying on the road?

Should I smile 'cause this boy I recently met showed me reasons to be happy?

Or should I sit back and wonder about the zillion reasons it won't work out between us?

Should I tell her that I love her, she's more than my sister to me? 

Or grieve 'cause she's leaving too?

Should I be happy cause this time what I learnt, told me I could be greater than I look in my dreams?

Or should I cry 'cause the path will make me distant from the ones I love too much?

Should I be happy 'cause I wanted to leave, and now I'm away?

Or should I cry 'cause I'm away?

I don't like being in the middle anymore.

But, somehow that has always been my home. 

“I am here.
My mind is not doing the trick anymore.
I am here. There goes your explanation. 
It comes with a presence.
It is honest.
It sings.”
— Anne Sexton, from The Complete Poems: Presence